如何让你的英语更加有「礼貌」

1.多用情态动词　　多用may,might,could,would等情态动词,它们可以弱化你的口气,让「坏消息」听起来没有那么糟糕。　　考虑下面的句子:　　I want more help to finish the report.　　这让对方感觉你的口气是在命令,如果你是和老板这样讲话,可能以为这年底的奖金要泡汤了。因此,你最好能弱化这种口气。　　It would be nice to have more help to finish the report.　　I could use more help to finish the report.　　再看上面那个「Please give me a cup of coffee.」我们加入情态动词,并且将please放到句尾,对方你的咖啡师(barista)马上会觉得你非常得体。　　Could you give me a cup of coffee, please?　　Would you give me a cup of coffee, please?　　2.多用softeners　　「I’m afraid」是常用的一个softener,用来弱化你的消极语气,我们一般用在句子的开头,类似的softener还有:frankly speaking,with all respect,to be honest等等。看这个过于直接的表述:　　I haven't finished the presentation.　　改正一下:　　I'm afraid I haven’t finished the presentation.　　另外再看两个例子,你可以自行体会:　　With all respect, I don’t think you have the experience for the role.　　To be honest with you, I think Simon’s strategy is better than yours.　　将softeners放在坏消息前面,就可以给对方一个心理预期,这样就减弱了负面消息本身的影响。　　3. 多用modifiers　　顾名思义,modifiers用来modify后面词的影响力。常见的modifiers有 a little bit, slight, slightly, probably, a little, a bit, small, one or two等。　　原句:We are having problems with the presentation.　　改为:We are having one or two problems with the new presentation.　　原句:You are too slow.　　改为:You are a little bit too slow.　　4. 改述否定句　　当你要表明一个否定的意思时,相比直接说出来,你可以通过改述(rephrase)的方式让句子意义听起来更加积极一些。　　I'm afraid I haven’t finished the presentation.　　更近一步,改为:　　I’m afraid I haven't been ableto finish the presentation yet.　　其中的「be able to」弱化了结果而突出了自己的努力——我一直在做,只是由于客观原因我才无法完成。最后的「yet」表明自己此时此刻依然在努力完成。　　由此推知,如果否定句中有「can't」或者「won't」,我们可以考虑用「be able to」代替,看例子:　　原句:　　I can't supply a full set of results.　　改为:　　I am not able to supply a full set of results.　　I am unable to supply a full set of results.　　原句:　　I am unhappy with the report.　　改为:　　I am not entirely happy with the report.　　I am not totally happy with the report.　　5. 将建议,命令类的话用反问的方式提出　　看例句:　　We should change our marketing plan!　　句子听起来是以命令的口吻,如果你是向平级的同事或者客户提出类似的建议,那么最好不要这么直接,可以尝试改为:　　Shouldn't we change our marketing plan?　　原句:　　We must take this strategy.　　改为:　　Couldn't we take this strategy?　　Wouldn't it be better for us to take this strategy?　　6. 用一般过去进行时　　看例句:　　I hope we can finish the presentation today.　　改为:　　I was hoping that we could finish the presentation today.　　用过去进行时可以让口气听起来多一些可供商量的空间,譬如:　　原句:　　I think we need to hire more employees.　　改为:　　I was thinking we need to hire more employees.　　原句:　　I aim to finish this project by the end of the month.　　改为:　　I was aiming to finish this project by the end of the month.